We are pleased to announce that the winner of our Win a Personalised Museum Visit writing competition is Bob Michie with his poem Dad’s War.
Dad’s War
Ma Da he nivver got tae war,
nae maitter foo he tried,
He twice gaed doon tae Montrose
tae sign on the dotted line.
Baith times his maister cam doon as weel,
An telt the recruitin’ mannie,
The loons a fairmer, workin hard,
tae feed the hale Damn country.
Bit nae tae miss oot o’ da’en his bit
Tae protect his bit o grun
He served his King & Country
By jinin’ Kinneff Home Guard.
They gave him a machine gun,
A Lewis so he said,
He did target practice intae a cave
On the shore by Boggartyhead.
He said he kept it alow his bed,
I dinna ken if its true
Bit I widna pit it past him
It’s the kinda thing he’d do.
He mustae been a nae bad sodger,
He wis made up tae a Corporal.
Nae as aul as Corporal Jones
An nae nearly half as sober!
I’ve still got an auld grenade
he practiced throwin it further,
It’s hollow in the middle noo,
So wir nae in mortal danger.
As fairmin fowk ar like tae dee
They moved fairms up near Stoney,
An so he jined the local squad,
Made up o Bunkers & Dominies.
He didnae really like them much,
Thocht he wis jist a Teuchter,
They took awa his Corporals stripes,
An gave him a rifle, aul an roosty
The manny in charge wis a real toffy cyard
Thocht he really kint how tae sodger
But Dad thocht he wis a real useless gowk
Didne ken ae ein o’ his gun fae the ither!
Ma wife wis spikken aboot her skweel
She gaed tae Fetteresso,
Sae did I, said Dad, at’s far I learnt
tae knife & strangle Germans!
He saw bombs drap, and planes that crashed,
He patrolled the Cowie line.
But aul Hitlers plans came tae bugger aul,
he lost in the hinner-ein.
Bob Michie